Complicated but Not Really

I feel like everything in my life is kinda up in the air right now. My feelings are just all over the place. Trying to decide what I want from this new adventure placed in front of me. Deciding if I want to date or if maybe being single is actually the better option. 

Part of me really wants to date again, but to be cautious. The other part of me kinda gets disgusted when I think about dating so soon after a break up. I don't feel like if I start dating so soon after that I will be doing the right thing for myself or my daughter. 

I am just going to give myself 100% to me and my daughter and take care of us before I start dating again. Get my house organized learn how to correctly mow my lawn (because honestly I had no clue what I was doing!). Get a good schedule down for us and get Cash trained a bit better. Just in general to keep my life organized. 

I am gonna take it one day at a time and maybe in a year or so I will be ready to let someone else into my life. Maybe two years... you know I don't really know how long it will be but I don't plan on actually looking for someone. 

It's so entirely to much for me to handle right now. I just want things to slow down and do my thing for awhile. 

This is the very first time I have actually wanted to be single. I've always wanted to be in a relationship because I thought I could handle it but for the first time I am happy to be single for a bit. So to any single mom's that feel that they need a partner to make it all better let me be your example as to why being single is better than a relationship that you aren't ready for. 

You can do it. You can succeed. You can do it by yourself but always remember your not alone, you have a beautiful child who loves you. Not only that you have many people who know what your going through and are going to be there for you. You are a super mom even if you don't think you are your child thinks that you are. That is all that matters. 

Stick in there momma! 

Millie's Zoo Day

This was the first time Millie went to the zoo that she was actually able to really interacted with what was going on around her. The weather was great about 75 degrees all day! I couldn't have asked for a nicer day weather wise!

Millie had a blast! It was so much fun to see her point at the animals and to tell her what they were. She is getting so much better at talking so she is able to repeat back a lot of what I am saying.

We did not spend a whole lot of time there just because I wanted it to be a nice evening and no one getting to cranky. Millie loved the penguins and the monkeys a lot and seemed to stare at them the longest. It was fun getting to watch her watch the penguins as the went by she would giggle and laugh and point at them.

She seemed to think the monkeys were kinda weird and just stared at them with big eyes. I think she may have been a bit scared of how big they were possibly and there was one that came right over to the window where she was at and just stared at her so I am sure that was pretty freaky.

I really enjoyed this trip so much getting to watch her pet the lama's and sheep. Seeing her eyes light up everywhere we went. Most of all I enjoyed it because I got to have her to myself for once and really see how big my daughter was getting.

She had fun on the jungle gym even though I was pretty much a wreck because of all the other kids running in circles around her. I am excited for her to be big enough to run around by herself but right now I don't mind being a bit clinging over her.

 The Marry go round was a huge hit except at first I thought she was going to scream the whole time but found the ceiling of the ride was pretty interesting to look out. It sure did save us from a melt down!

Overall a pretty great day! I can't wait to take Millie to do more fun things like this and to watch her grow up to be such a beautiful little girl that I know she will be. I feel like I finally got my daughter back and am getting to experience so much more with her.

Life is pretty happy. I wouldn't change it for anything!

This thing is a bit wobbly momma! 

Monkey See Monkey Do

Love this picture!!